Sometimes things can get to be more than you can handle. I know this from my own personal experience. I suffered a great loss and after a year of trying to cope with that loss on my own, I knew that it was time for me to reach out for some help. I was missing work, didn't want to do much of anything and just didn't feel like myself. I started seeing a counselor each week, and it has helped. If you are struggling to recover after a loss, this blog may be able to help you find the help you need to get past it.
When it comes to relationship counseling, managing the communication dynamic can be difficult. Sometimes it's difficult to see past the emotional turmoil and your own personal hang-ups to be able to communicate effectively with your partner. Before you find yourself ready to walk away, there are a few things that your counselor will want you to know.
Be Responsible For Your Feelings
It is important that you take personal responsibility for how you manage your feelings as well as for what you may have done to contribute to them. Sometimes it's easier to blame your spouse or your partner and convince yourself that their actions are the cause of your feelings, but the fact is that you are the only one who can decide how you will react to a situation and how you will manage your feelings. Taking ownership of those feelings and your contribution to them will allow you to be more deliberate and considerate in how you respond to your significant other.
Feel Safe Within Yourself
Especially for women, it's common to seek a sense of safety and protection with your significant other. However, that creates an environment of dependency that puts a lot of expectations on your partner. In order to contribute equally to the relationship, you need to have your own sense of security and comfort in yourself. When you feel safe within yourself, you'll feel more confident and secure about sharing your own feelings with your partner.
Trust Your Own Instincts
When you learn to trust your own instincts and your own gut feelings, that inner voice becomes a sense of confidence. You will find that you doubt your partner less when you don't allow yourself to go down the psychological path of questioning their motives, their actions, and their feelings. Trusting your gut instincts will help you to do that because you can have confidence in your situation and in your partner when you don't have those subconscious worries.
Don't Judge Yourself
One of the most difficult things for you to do for yourself is to forgive your own shortcomings and not judge yourself. Allow yourself to feel more compassion for where you've come to and what you've accomplished instead of feeling judgemental about what you've done in the past. When you stop judging yourself, it will be easier to stop projecting your own insecurities on your partner.
For more help with learning how to be present in your relationship and be an active communicator, talk with a local counseling specialist near you to learn more about therapy for women and men.Share