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counseling to get past a great loss

Sometimes things can get to be more than you can handle. I know this from my own personal experience. I suffered a great loss and after a year of trying to cope with that loss on my own, I knew that it was time for me to reach out for some help. I was missing work, didn't want to do much of anything and just didn't feel like myself. I started seeing a counselor each week, and it has helped. If you are struggling to recover after a loss, this blog may be able to help you find the help you need to get past it.

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counseling to get past a great loss

Great Expectations: What Marriage Counseling May (And May Not) Do For You

by Jessica Mason

Seeing a marriage counselor can be beneficial for a couple at any stage of the relationship. Many couples choose to see a counselor as a move to ensure that they start a marriage on the right foot, while others wait until many years into the relationship when things are going sour before they seek help. There's no universal right or wrong time to see a counselor, but it's never a bad idea. Just be sure that you don't enter the therapy relationship with unrealistic expectations. Here are some things you can (and a few you can't) expect from marriage counseling.

It Won't Make Your Pain Disappear…But It Can Prevent Some Potential Wounds

Counseling may help you and your partner learn how to communicate in a kinder manner so that you don't cause one another future pain. However, it won't undo the past hurts that you may have caused each other in the relationship. It can help you come to terms with these wounds and integrate them into your life so that they don't handcuff you and hold you back.

It Will Hold Your Partner Accountable…But That's Not All

The nice thing about therapy is that it will hold your partner accountable for what they say and do. The unpleasant thing? You are also held accountable for all the things you do and say. No responsible counselor would be unconditionally on your side. On the other, all counselors should treat you with respect and professionally give objective reasons for why you may be wrong if they disagree with you.

It Won't Provide You with a New Best Friend

It's okay to feel close to your counselor. You may come to care for your counselor and vice versa. However, it will nonetheless be a professional relationship, and you can't expect to eventually be hanging out with your therapist for fun on a Friday night.

It Will Provide Someone You Can Talk To

You are allowed to say anything within the counseling session. (That is, within reason. You must say it respectfully, and illegal activities can break the expectation of confidentiality.) Your counselor will be able to do the following for you:

  • Listen respectfully to what you have to say.
  • Tactfully point out things that you may say that are unfair or incorrect.
  • Show empathy for your pain.
  • Keep everything confidential.
  • Provide expertise on certain situations.
  • Give you insights on some of the issues you face with your partner.
  • Hold you accountable for your actions.

Finally, marriage counseling can help you build or even re-build a strong foundation of healthy communication with your partner. It can be many different things for different people, so be sure to communicate your expectations to your counselor at the start of the relationship to ensure that you are both on the same page. Contact a medical provider, such as the Associates For Counseling & Psychotherapy, for more information.